God speaks in mysterious ways...

Do you ever get that feeling that God is telling you something? Leading you in a direction, not in any specific, big, profound way. But in tiny little steps, with little hints that you're on the right track?

I know that eventually my life's work will be helping people, in one form or another. And I've struggled to figure out exactly in what realm that may be. But I know the answer is coming. In due time.

At church last week, Pastor Scott said this bible verse: Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will direct your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6  It wasn't the first or even second time that I had heard that bible verse, but this time it was different. It struck a cord. Tonight as I was getting in my car, feeling great (which has not been a super common feeling lately for one reason or another) and I looked at the car ahead of me, and that bible verson was written all on the back of the car window. It occured to me, I can't take care of other people, and in turn feel fulfilled, if I don't care of myself. I can't serve other people, if I can't even serve myself.

Then while I'm sitting here reading another blog, about her experience in Ethiopia, the song by Carrie Underwood "How great thou Art" started playing on my ipod. And it gave me chills (It ALWAYS gives me chills, but it really stood out to me this time, how amazing it must feel for her, to be living by following her passion). So what is my passion? I know I'm heading in the right direction. I still don't know where that place is. But it feels so good knowing that I'm one step closer. It's amazing how much better you feel when you stop looking at how far you have to go, and simply have gratitude for how far you have come.

Gotta' have Faith.

"I never thought of it that way before"

I have a million and one other things that I should probably be doing right now, but I thought about this earlier today and it keeps popping in my head. So apparently I'm meant to relay this message to someone. Whether it rings true to you now, or it's something you remember, and helps you get through a hard time in the future. It's a lesson I have never forgotton.

Suprise, Suprise, it has something to do with the Oprah show :) A woman came on the show, her daughter had been brutally murdered years before and it was her wish to come on Oprah's show and speak to the audience and the world, to gain some sort of closure for her and her daughter. She had left everything in her daughter's room, the way it was before she had died. "My goal for the yeard 2000, is to tell my daughter's story on your show, and then let that go, and get on with my life...."

Her Mom mourned the loss of her daughter every day for 10 years, "For me, Lori died just as easily today as she died ten years ago..." As time passed, she felt like the loss of her daughter was a hole that got deeper and deeper.

JoAnne, the mother, wrote to the show with the hopes of getting help to end her obsession with the death of her daughter. She was stuck in grief and wanted to move on.

Oprah asked her, "What is it that you want to say?"

"That LoriAnn was a person, she did not deserve to be thrown away like a bag of trash, they threw her away in the river like a bag of trash. I just want to go to the highest mountain and scream and let people know the pain that will never go away because of this."

And Dr. Phil asked "Do you want it to go away? I mean, do you really want it to go away??"

She responded quietly through tears, "Yes, I do."

And he came back firmly, "I'm asking you now, can you at least entertain the fact, that how long you grieve, is not a reflection of how deeply you loved your daughter?"

"I believe I do."

"Can you accept, if you get closure on this, if you say, "I'm not going to be obsessed with this anymore", you are not betraying your daughter?"

"Yes I think I can."

"If she could talk to you right now, do you think she would say, "Mother, I want you to hurt every day for the rest of your life to prove that you loved me."

"Oh gosh no, she would be very angry at me over this."

"So it wouldn't be a betrayal. Maybe the betrayal is focusing on the day of her death, rather than celebrating the event of her life. She lived for 18 vibrant, wonderful years. And you focus on the day that she died."

"I never thought of it that way, I really never thought of it that way."

After that conversation was finished and they were ending the interview, the Mother said, through tears and what appeared to be a glow of newness and relief: "I thought after I had made this goal, that I could go home, I'm sorry, I was going to go home and take my life."

"But now you've changed your mind." -Oprah

"Oh yes, oh yes, I've changed my mind."

This story has always stuck with me, whether for the simple sense that I just love the story and it touches my heart, but also for the underlying message, that a lot of the way that things affect us in life, is the way we think about them. The meaning we give to a circumstance or a situation. She was holding onto the grief because she thought by doing that, she was honoring her daughter who was brutally murdered. But truly, once she changed her perspective, and realized that how she was choosing to behave, was exactly what her daughter would NOT have wanted, it changed her life. And she found a reason to live.

♥

Truly live, every. single. day.

"As you grow up you will learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You'll have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break other's hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old love did.  You'll cry because time is moving too fast, and you'll eventually lose somebody you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back. Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin."

This quote has left me feeling inspired to make sure I'm always enjoying and LIVING every single day.

Every day we are faced with choices, decisions, opportunities that whether big or small, could potentially change our lives forever. It's our every day choices that ultimately have gotten us to where we are now. I often find myself in situations where I'm not sure what the "right" thing to do. I'm not talking about moral dilemmas. I'm talking, friendships, relationships, simple daily opportunities. As I've "grown up" I've come to realize that the "right" thing to do, is whatever is going to make me happiest. The only person I need to impress is myself. If I impress others in the process, then great.

So today I challenge you, when an opportunity presents itself, think "What do I truly want?" Making decisions all about yourself may sound selfish, and there is certain times you must put others before yourself. However, if you are making decisions that make you happy, others will also be happier around you.

♥

How did I get so lucky??

I know I said I was going to try to write in this every day, and I really truly am going to get back in the groove, but life has been crazy busy and moving in a very positive direction, sooooo I'm finally feeling caught up :)

I decided I'm going to (finally) start writing in my journal in response to Oprah's Life Class questions. I wish I could watch the show every day but I can't so this is the next best thing.

The fourth question is what inspired me to write this blog post. It asked "What choices have you made that are genuine expressions of who you are and in alignment with what you want from life?" I knew even before I was done reading the question, what my answer would be. ITALY ♥

So why? Why was my choice to move to Italy for a semester, a genuine expression of who I am?

1. Travel - always has been and ALWAYS will be my most favorite thing to do, so given the opportunity to travel around not only Italy, but Europe, was beyond a dream come true.
2. Independence - I've always been quite independent... this was just another step.
3. Food - um, must I even explain this one? Especially with my LOVE for Italian food.
4. Friendship - I love my friends, and the friends I made in Italy are more than friends, they are sisters. And I could not have dreamt of meeting better girls. I also made a point to talk to people, as many people as I could (in as much Italian as I could, meaning, hardly any Italian, ha!) and create "friendships" or a common bond with Italians. When my friend Kristen came to visit, my gf's in Italy asked if I always talked to everyone that I passed..."Same girl, Different Country" :)
5. Learning - I love learning and I always want to be in the process of learning new things. For as long as I live. Living in a foreign country, you are ALWAYS learning.
6. Growth - This goes almost hand in hand with learning. As long as you learn, you are growing as a person. I've said it once (ok many times) and I'll say it again, it's not until you stop learning & growing, that you get old :)
7. Memories that will last a lifetime - I love having a good time, and making memories that I'll always remember. 5,000+ pictures later, and thousands more memories, Italy gave me some of the most amazing moments of my life, that I will never forget.


I seriously pray that all of you reading this, takes the time at some point in your life to go to Italy. I'm slightly biased I know, however, I traveled to many places in Europe, and Italy always felt like home. It's the most amazing and beautiful country and I cannot wait to go back. (If you would like a personal tour guide, call me!)

Now I ask the same question of you. What choices have you made that are genuine expressions of who you are and in alignment with what you want from life?

And just for fun...

Here are some of my FAVORITE memories from my four months living in Italy.

Learning to cook my FAVORITE Italian dish, Spaghetti Carbonara

'Jersey Shore' Night, this was one of our first nights out together!

A little further into my time there, all the essentials I forgot to pack. Thanks to my AMAZING big brother.

My Valentines Day pic of the Duomo and the Balloons look so perfect by it :)

Standing on the Ponte Vecchio. How is this real life??

A picture of the Arno and part of the Ponte Vecchio. It blows my mind how beautiful Florence is!

Well, can you tell they don't like their Prime Minister?? This was a big protest...I mean HUGE protest!

The guys at Gusta Pizza love us :)

My first of three trips to Roma. Ohhhh I loved Rome. SO much history.

Carnivale in Viareggio, SO fun. Confetti, vino and crazy costumes everywhere!

We went to Milan for Fashion Week. What did we do?? Fed the birds and ate Burger King :) ok and toured the city a bit to see all the amazinggggg stores!

My first trip to the top of the Duomo in Florence. Its 463 stairs, but the view is worth every single step!

our first family photo. Oh I just love these girls :)

Standing in Awe. It is SO much bigger and more beautiful than even I expected!

My last picture up by Piazzale Michelangelo. My heaven.

Last night out with the girls before heading back to the states. Wahhh!!!

The COOLEST gift EVER. My roomie made these keys for us in her jewelry making class. It was inspired by our key to our bedrooms, and the top part of the key is a fleur di lis which is a common symbol for Florence. It also has a '2' on it which was our apartment number and Via dei Tavolini which was our sweet little street's name!

Birthday dinner at Acqua al 2. Ah-maz-ing.

Seriously in love with Cinque Terre.

Girls will be Girls :) In Athens at the Olympic Stadium.

I love Italians so much. They are so dramatic. These kids looked straight out of an adult soap opera, and they were only five years old! The drama of kindergarten.........

This is in my cooking class. We learned to cook 3 Italian dishes a week and at the end we had to cook our favorite dish to be graded. We chose Pumpkin Risotto. Sounds a little weird, but it's SO delish!

Gravity bar in the Guinness Factory. Favorite part of Dublin!

On our way back from the market one morning. So so beautiful.

Literally my VERY first picture of Italy. Still on the plane :) I was already in love.

I may not be Italian by blood, but I'm Italian by heart. This city especially will ALWAYS hold a huge piece of my heart. Ahhh Firenze ♥

Step Outside of Your Comfort Zone

This weekend I went up to Fort Collins to visit my brother who still lives there. Fort Collins is where I first moved in 2005 when I graduated high school and went to college there. I spent 5 great years in Fort Collins but when I moved to Denver this summer I was ready to leave. I never thought I actually missed FoCo until I went back this weekend, I didn't see it coming at all. But I started reminiscing of all the memories and growth I had in that cute & quaint town. I moved there as an 18 year old girl fresh out of Wisconsin and left a 24 year old, dare I say, woman?! I know I still have so much more to learn and my whole life ahead of me, but I'm so thankful for the years I spent, in what started out as a very unfamiliar town, and ended up one of my comfort zones, Fort Collins, Colorado.

As I drove out of FoCo on Harmony to take I-25 back down to Denver I looked in my rear view mirror at the foothills and began second-guessing. Is Denver right for me?? Is that where I really belong. I spent the whole drive back down to Denver thinking what life would be like if we never left our comfort zones. If our fight to avoid change actually worked, how boring would life be?? And then as I exited onto Park Ave, the skyline quickly reminded why I moved to Denver. It's beautiful, there's so much energy and beauty, and Denver is definitely where I belong.

So today I challenge you, to embrace change and find ways to step outside of your comfort zone.


 ♥

It gets better...

I am feeling a huge tornado of emotions right now after reading this article on Huffpost. It breaks my heart to hear yet ANOTHER child has taken their life because they can't find an end to their pain.  After taking a class; Psychology of Death & Dying, I have very mixed emotions about suicide over all.  My general stance is that Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I wish SO badly that kids and teens could understand that. I've never suffered with the pains of depression as many of these kids have, so I partly don't feel like I have much room to talk. I have had close friends that have struggled and overcome, and one thing I do know, is if you can manage to stay strong and hold on, it will get better.

Here is the article.

ALSO, in the process of writing this article I came across this amazing website, It Gets Better Project

Please take the time to pledge your support to this great organization, it has amazing resources to help kids & adults that are having a hard time and also great support videos created by everyday people like you and me as well as many influential people in our society.

Here is one of the many videos, created by employees at Pixar

That is all ♥

The Story of Life

I figured since I really wanted to make a point to post every day, and was so busy yesterday that I never got around to creating a post, that I'd make up for it by posting twice today. Well, actually I'm probably just looking for an excuse to post this. It's called "The Story of Life". I'm not sure who the author is but it's something that I've always love to read over the years. In fact, for a long time I had it framed in my room. Great thoughts, great reminders. Enjoy! ♥

Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there, to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or to help you figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be (possibly your roommate, neighbor, coworker, long lost friend, lover, or even a complete stranger), but when you lock eyes with them, you know at that very moment they will affect your life in some profound way.

And sometimes things happen to you that may seem horrible, painful, and unfair at first, but in reflection you find that without overcoming those obstacles you would have never realized your potential, strength, willpower, or heart.

Everything happens for a reason.

Nothing happens by chance or by means of good luck.

Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness, and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, whatever they may be, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere. It would be safe and comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless.

The people you meet who affect your life, and the success and downfalls you experience, help to create who you are and who you become. Even the bad experiences can be learned from. In fact, they are probably the most poignant and important ones.

If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious when you open your heart.

If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because in a way, they are teaching you to love and how to open your heart and eyes to things.

Make every day count.

Appreciate every moment and take from those moments everything that you possibly can for you may never be able to experience it again.

Talk to people that you have never talked to before, and actually listen.

Let yourself fall in love, break free, and set your sights high.

Hold your head up because you have every right to.

Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, it will be hard for others to believe in you.

You can make of your life anything you wish.

Create your own life and then go out and live it with absolutely no regrets.

Most importantly, if you LOVE someone tell him or her, for you never know what tomorrow may have in store.

And learn a lesson in life each day that you live.

That's The Story Of Life.

Surrender

There are many authors that I have learned SO much from over the years. Here is a great reminder, brought to you by Cheryl Richardson...

"There is a Universal energy, a Divine force that creates us; sustains us; connects us to one another; and works in cooperation with our thoughts, words, and actions to generate our life experiences. When we recognize and learn to work in partnership with this benevolent power, we become masters of our own destiny. The formula is simple: Think thoughts that make you feel good, make choices that make you feel good, and take actions that make you feel good. Then surrender the outcome, trusting that Life will bring you what you need to grow and be happy."

Speaking of Surrender, I'm going to state the obvious to those of you who know me, I am borderline obsessed with Oprah. I have been watching her for longer than I can remember. Her show started in 1986, half a year before I was even born. So until her show ended this spring, there was not a day of my life that her show hasn't had some sort of influence on me. Even though it's officially over, it will always be my favorite show. There are many moments on her show that stand out to me as my absolute favorites. My favorite shows are rarely the ones with actors or actresses and all the famous people she had on over the years, they were more often the shows with "everyday" people, hearing about their experiences. These segments forced me to think differently and taught me lessons I still to this day, have not forgotten.

One story that Oprah told about her personal life, has had a particularly big impact on me. Before her show was even nationally syndicated, she had the opportunity to audition for a part in the film "The Color Purple". She says she has never wanted anything more in her life, than the role she auditioned for. This story still gives me chills, watch the video to see what happened.......

[This isn't a clip of the original segment that I had heard this story on, this is her speaking about it in her Master Class show. If you have 10 minutes to watch, please do, it gets me every time.]

"You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand." ♥ John 13:7

Positive Reinforcement, not just for kids & dogs anymore!

I'm sure you are wondering where the title of my blog comes from...

     I had been thinking of countless ideas to title my blog over the past few weeks. I'd think while driving, falling asleep, working and nothing quite seemed to fit what I wanted my blog to embody. I've often heard our best and most creative thoughts often happen in the quiet of a morning shower, and that's where I came up with the idea for this title. Although I didn't graduate with a degree in Psychology, I chose to focus many of my elective credits on Psych classes, and positive reinforcement was a very prevalent term in many of those classes. Although it's usually used when talking about raising children and training our pets, often it's something we as adults often need and seek from others, and is often something we lack in our lives.
     My whole purpose in creating this blog is simply to provide you with some of the "Positive Reinforcement" you may need in your life. I love quotes, pictures & stories that encourage me to live a better life. If they uplift me and inspire me to be a better person and live a better life, maybe they will do the same for you too. Maybe not everything I post will feel like it's relevant to your life, but my hopes are that there will be moments where you think "I needed to hear that" or in the words of Oprah, maybe you'll have an "aha moment" and think, "I've never thought of it like that before!" We don't get old with age, we get old when we stop learning, growing and changing...

"I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today,

life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.

I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things:

a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.

I've learned that making a "living" is not the same thing as making a "life."
I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.

I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands.

You need to be able to throw something back.

I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart,

I usually make the right decision.

I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.

I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone,

People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.

I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.

I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did,

 but people will never forget how you made them feel."

~ Maya Angelou